The milestone of our children leaving home is something all parents have to face at some point – whether they're going away to university or establishing their independence by moving into a home of their own. While for many of us moving home is exciting for some, moving when the children have flown the nest, can carry a heavy emotional burden for those involved. Deborah Richards, Managing Partner of Maddisons Residential, explains why this type of house move can be so difficult and how best to approach it.

Why right-sizing can be a difficult move for home-owners

Tunbridge Wells is a town that for many years has been a popular destination for the family market, drawn to our extensive amenities, green open spaces and, of course, coveted schooling. At some point the owners of these family properties need or want not to down-size, or “right-size” as we call it. The children have left home and the owners want a property that meets their changing needs, with less ongoing maintenance and cost (often releasing valuable equity) and are happy knowing their beloved home will be cherished by a new family. 

This is probably one of the hardest moves that any owner will make. Every property purchase until this time has had a sense of climbing the property ladder, and now there will be a move to a property with perceived compromises. It is likely to be smaller, will possibly have closer neighbours and lack the period charm they may be used to and of course may involve a different way of living altogether

There will also be the sense of leaving a home where a lifetime of memories has been made, and the children are often also sad about this change. The “family home” has a special place in everyone’s heart.

Embrace the benefits in your new, smaller home

Believe it or not, eventually you’ll find things to love and appreciate about an empty nest. It offers a chance to create a new interior layout that suits your current needs and perhaps update any tired furniture.

Many of our right-sizing clients tell us that post the move they feel liberated, with valuable equity released to aid retirement or help their children, and free from the shackles of maintaining such a large home.

Adapting to your empty nest now the children have moved out

Some people understandably find the transition a challenge and often are stuck as to how to create new ways to fill the gap of their children leaving home. Below we share some ideas of how to cope with empty nest syndrome:

  • Make social connections – use your free time to reconnect with old friends..
  • Set goals for the future - it sparks motivationand promotes a healthy sense of perspective. Setting and achieving goals also encourages the development of your authentic identity.
  • Take up a new hobby or career - try out a variety of new activities in your area, whether that’s a book club or a gym class. A new physical activity is a wonderful way of broadening your social circle while maintaining your physical health.
  • Travel - an empty nest provides the perfect opportunity to start planning trips to places you’ve always wanted to see.
  • Involve your children – make them a pack up all their remaining possessions so they feel a part of the move and find closure.

Right-sizing can be a daunting prospect for many, especially if you are leaving behind your family home. Yes, this will be a move that will involve huge emotional upheaval, driven by the head rather than the heart, but we are yet to meet anyone who regretted it! If you would like more support on how to go about this, please, contact us, we would love to help.